TOP 50 OF 2016 – 30-21



HEY GUYS HERE WE ARE the top 30. Which contains the MUCH more exciting TOP 25! MOVIES! OF 2016! WHICH ENDED 115 DAYS AGO!

30. Krisha
Directed by Trey Edward Shults
Written by Trey Edward Shults

Krisha is a dependent, alcoholic, emotionally abusive piece of shit that this amazing script makes us feel so, so sorry for. She comes home for thanksgiving and shoves herself in her estranged son’s life and destroys every little piece of their relationship that they had left.

This movie is full of amateurs. Amateur actors, writer/director, crew. I don’t actually know about the crew but still. There are NO big names attached to this movie. And it’s better than most movies with big names that I’ve ever seen. Definitely watch this if you have the chance.

29. Loving
Directed by Jeff Nichols
Written by Jeff Nichols

Loving is one of those movies that comes along and everyone talks about how great it is, but then it gets forgotten at awards season. I think it got ignored at the Oscars because it’s so subdued and quiet. It’s not a loud, boisterous courtroom drama and Ruth Negga doesn’t fall to her knees screaming about equal rights. It, like the couple that inspired it, just wanted a simple life and to not be bothered. This movie is simple, and doesn’t want to be bothered by a bunch of prestige picture nonsense. It’s a beautiful movie and a beautiful story.

28. Green Room
Directed by Jeremy Saulnier
Written by Jeremy Saulnier

One of Anton Yelchin’s best, and sadly final, performances.

Green Room is about a poor punk band who accidentally books a show at a Nazi bar, and instead of playing and leaving, they play “Nazi Punks, Fuck Off” by The Dead Kennedys and piss them all off and basically turn their shit into an ultraviolent fight for survival.

Patrick Stewart plays the skinhead leader and that man has never been more terrifying.

27. Kung Fu Panda 3
Directed by Jennifer Yuh Nelson and Alessandro Carloni
Written by Jonathan Aibel and Glenn Berger

I love the Kung Fu Panda series and this one may be the best yet. I LOVE KUNG FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

26. Fences
Directed by Denzel Washington
Written by August Wilson

Fences was a play I haven’t seen. Now it’s a movie I have seen, and it was great. Denzel Washington was great, as always. Viola Davis won a deserved Oscar. It was filmed and takes place in Pittsburgh, PA, which is where I live right now, so that’s cool. I often drive through the area this takes place.

It’s a powerful, emotional movie that is practically pure character development and conversation. That doesn’t always work well for a movie, but this time I feel that it did, exceptionally so.

25. The Shallows
Directed by Jaume Collet-Serra
Written by Anthony Jaswinski

The Shallows is like Jaws meets Gravity, but not as good as Jaws and better than Gravity. It’s about a woman who decides to go surfing at a super cool private beach below the border and, what do you know, gets hunted by a big ass shark.

This is a tense, thrilling, crazy movie with a career-defining performance by Blake Lively. I hope she continues to take great, challenging roles like this because wow do I hate some of the crap she’s worked on. She really shines in The Shallows though. One of the best performances of the year. And oh man was that seagull cute.

24. The Lobster
Directed by Yorgos Lanthimos
Written by Efthimis Filippou and Yorgos Lanthimos

Yorgos Lanthimos gave us Dogtooth, a minimalist, surrealist, anti-fascist masterpiece. Dogtooth is one of my favorite movies of all time. The Lobster is not as good as Dogtooth.

But oh boy oh boy is it good. And it comes extremely close in several scenes.

The central plot is that basically people get sent to a weird getaway with a ton of weird rules and they have a certain amount of time to fall in love before being turned into an animal of their choice. And there’s like a weird asexual underground.

Basically it’s the most uncomfortable movie of the year and I LOVE it.

23. Demon
Directed by Marcin Wrona
Written by Marcin Wrona

Demon is an amazing horror movie because, even when it ends, you’re sort of barely sure it was even a horror movie. It’s the kind of horror movie that kind of eats away at you throughout, and you don’t really get too scared of it until you’re thinking about it afterward.

It also reminded me of the Lars von Trier movie Melancholia, because wow this is the worst wedding I’ve ever seen.

Tragically, the amazing young writer/director Marcin Wrona committed suicide while promoting this movie in September 2015. He was 42.

22. Everybody Wants Some!!
Directed by Richard Linklater
Written by Richard Linklater

Everybody Wants Some!! was referred to as “Brohood” by many fans and critics, probably mostly because it was directed by Boyhood director Richard Linklater. That being said, this movie was way more fun than Boyhood. Boyhood was MAYBE the better movie (maybe), but this movie was almost as fun as Linklater’s best movie, Dazed and Confused, of which this is a spiritual sequel.

It follows a freshman baseball player entering college in Texas in 1980, and all the shenanigans he and his teammates get into throughout. It doesn’t feature the multiple perspective aspect of Dazed and Confused, which follows multiple characters in multiple social groups. Everybody Wants Some!! mostly focuses on the perspective and experiences of Jake, who is a relatively normal-seeming guy. But he’s very likable. Anyway the whole movie is very likable. It’s really VERY good.

21. 10 Cloverfield Lane
Directed by Dan Trachtenberg
Written by Josh Campbell, Matt Stuecken, and Damien Chazelle

I love Cloverfield. Love it. Definitely my favorite “found footage” film of all time. 10 Cloverfield Lane is HANDS-DOWN better. Although, despite, the title and universe, it’s almost unfair to compare the two, and this is a COMPLETELY different movie altogether.

10 Cloverfield Lane is about a woman who finds herself locked in a bunker and told by John Goodman (who should have at least been nominated for an Oscar) that the world has ended and she can’t leave.

As the mysteries unfold, the movie becomes more and more fascinating, ultimately revealing an ending that, for me, really paid off, and for other people was super disappointing. But they can SHUT UP because it was AWESOME DON’T LOOK IT UP IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN IT JUST WATCH THE MOVIE.


Anyway guys that’s it for today, sorry these are a little spread out, between work and then playing video games and forgetting to write, I really have a lot on my plate lately. UPDATE: Saw Beauty and the Beast. Loved every second of it. Disney’s best live-action remake so far probably I can’t think too deeply on that right now because I’m tired and have work OK BYE.


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